they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
