We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
Randomize
