My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
they're like a gay fantastic four
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
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