Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
Randomize
