I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
Randomize