Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
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