North Korea, Best Korea!
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
Randomize
