just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
