his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
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