do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
Randomize
