ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
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