I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
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