when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
