See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
Randomize
