We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize