redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
Randomize
