It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
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