It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Randomize
