when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
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