Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
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