I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
im holly from the hills drunk
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Randomize
