Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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