Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize