i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
