I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
Also, beer. Big fan.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
Randomize
