Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
Randomize
