i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
Randomize
