Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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