R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Randomize
