don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
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