so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
Randomize
