I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Randomize
