It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
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