It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
And my parents said I crawled through the house
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
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