I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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