I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
Randomize
