my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
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