at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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