But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
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