Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
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