Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
