My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Randomize