why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
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