mustard is like jesus in yellow tights
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
Randomize