You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
Randomize
