Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
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