I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
Randomize
