We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
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