So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
Randomize
