Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
GOOD IDEA: Stealing the bike a couple blocks away so I don't have to walk. BAD IDEA: riding bike for the first time in years drunk as hell. I'm bleeding and my body hurts and once again I can't find my car.
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
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