my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
Randomize
